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I got a lot of response on my last blog article, and one of the e-mails was from my very good friend, Marc, who has worked on cruise ships almost all his adult life. He sent me a link to a bunch of questions he claims that has been asked by cruise guests. I thought they were hilarious.

Picture from avidcruiser.com

“Does the crew sleep on board?”

“How far above sea level are we?”

“Is the island surrounded by water?”

“Are all Caribbean islands the same size?”

“How does the captain know which port to go to?”

“Can we get off in the Panama Canal?”

“Does the ship generate its own electricity?”

“Does the elevator go up as well as down?”

“Why is the sauna so hot?”

“Are there two seetings at the midnight buffet?”

“Do we have to stay up until midnight to change our clocks?”

“Does the chef cook himself?”

“What happens to the ice sculptures after they melt?”

“How many fjords to the dollar?”

“What time’s the 2 o’clock tour?”

“Where’s the bus for the walking tour?”

“Can you see the equator from the deck?”

“Does the ship dock in the middle of town?”

“I’m married, but can I come to the single’s party?”

“How many knots does the ship go to the gallon?”

“Does the island float?”

“Do you send the laundry ashore?”

“Do these stairs go up as well as down?”

“Why is it my 3-year old can wear shorts but I can’t?”

“Do we have to eat dinner at both seatings?”

“I know that ships often serve smoked salmon, but I am a non-smoker”

“Can the iced tea be served hot?”

“Can you please change this spoon for a fork? I’ve already got five spoons.”

“Why can’t the late-night show be in the morning?”

“Do we have to leave the ship to go on the tour?”

“Does the helicopter tour leave from the upper deck?”

“Will we have time to take the shore excursion?”

“If I don’t buy a shore excursion, am I allowed off in port?”

“Are the entertainers paid?”

“Why aren’t the dancers fully dressed?”

“How do we know which photos are ours?”

“Will the ship wait for the tour buses to come back?”

“Will I get wet if I go snorkeling?”

“Is the doctor qualified?”

“Who’s driving the ship if the captain is at the cocktail party?”

“Does the sun always rise on the left side of the ship?”

“Is trapshooting always held outside?”

“Should I put my luggage ourside the cabin before or after I go to sleep?”

“Does the outside cabin mean it’s outside the ship?”

“Is that the same moon we see at home?”

“Why did the Greeks build so many ruins?”

“Windsor Castle is beautiful, but why did they build it so close to the airport?”

“Are the glaciers always there?”

“Where is the good shopping in Antarctica?”

“Was the fish caught this morning by the crew?”

“Can you tell me what time the volcano will erupt? I want to be sure to take a photograph.”

Passenger: “What is caviar?”
Waiter: “Fish eggs, sir”
Passenger: “In that case, I’ll have two, over-easy!”

Source:Lou’s Cosmic Connection

- Picture from icanhaspixiedust.wordpress.com -